To my little angel

Dear Chubby,

This was going to be your week. It was the week you were due to be born. A week that I was so looking forward to -- to meeting you and having you in my arms. Both your Dad and I were excited to hear your cry and kiss your sweet head. But that dream of ours didn't come true.

Instead, I've been dreading this week for the last seven months -- ever since I knew we'd never meet in this world.

I was really sad on Wednesday -- your due date. But I made it through. I went through the motions of going to work and school and was drained by the time I got home.

Chubs, I believe you're in a great place, surrounded by great grandparents that love you. You get to play with a dog named Cinnamon and a bird named Aussie. But your Mama still misses you.

I know you're looking down on us. I wonder if you're happy that you're going to have a little brother or sister? Or do you feel like you're missing out? Even though it looks like we're moving on, in our hearts we still miss you and love you so much.

I'm already just like your grandma. Sometimes I accidently call you Boo or sometimes I accidently call Boo your name.
You, my angel, won't ever have to be hungry. But there are hungry kids here in this world. So for your due date present, we decided to help our orphans in Haiti. We bought them lots of meals so that they can get real food in their bellys. So they can feel full and satisfied. If you get a chance, you should visit those orphans and help protect them so that they don't feel so hungry. Hopefully, someday I'll get to go meet them. It won't be this summer, but maybe in a couple of years. I'll wait. Just as I wait to meet you.

I love you, my angel. I will always love you.

Love,
Mama

J.B.

Pregnancy Brain

I have it. Pregnancy Brain.

I'm actually lucky I remembered to write this post.

So today I'm driving to work. All I can think about is getting a cinnamon and sugar bagel from Bruegger's. Healthy, right?

So I pull up to Bruegger's. I debated going to Subway instead. They were giving away free breakfast. But nope, I really wanted something sweet and an egg sandwich just didn't sound appealing.

I went inside. Got my sandwich. Paid. And went to grab my keys.

My keys weren't in my purse. I check my jacket pockets.

Not in there, either.

I check the purse again. Nothing. I check the pockets again. Nothing.

Great.

So I went back to my car.

I let out a sigh of relief when I saw the car was unlocked. I got in and saw the keys were still in the ignition.

And then...a gasp of horror when I realized...the clock was on...the radio was on...

I left the car running.

Apparently my one-track mind too preoccupied thinking about a cinnamon and sugar bagel to turn off the car. Awesome.

J.B.

It's official...

We made the big announcement on Facebook yesterday. It's official.

We are expecting!

We are so excited. We are so blessed. At times it still seems so surreal that there is really a baby inside me.

Although the ultrasound we had yesterday definitely made it more real.

Seeing the baby and hearing the heartbeat...it is just...awesome. I didn't cry. I felt proud. Proud that the little person is ours. Proud of her heart that is growing strong. Proud of his little alien looking face. Proud of her arms and legs wiggling around. Proud that it has already grown to 5 1/2 cm.

I am doing pretty good. I think I'm moving beyond the morning sickness stage. I'm still tired a lot. But it's all definitely very worthwhile. I'm 12 weeks and due on Halloween. So we're calling the little one Baby Boo.

I'm sure I'll be blogging about this new development a time or two more in the days and months to come. ;)

J.B.

Great start

This morning Papa Bear had an audiologist appointment nearby my office. He was asking what time he should plan on leaving, since he usually doesn't head that way during the morning rush hour. I had a brilliant idea.

Today is the third Tuesday of the month. That means this awesome restaurant in my building gives free breakfast to the people who work in the office complex. They have scones, fruit, eggs, bacon or sausage and potatoes. For free!

So we headed up to my office early today and enjoyed a nice family breakfast. A great way to start the morning.
J.B.

A visit with my grandparents

My grandparents don't live in the same city as me. Or even the same state. So a visit to their house has always been a big deal. A couple of weeks ago, I had the opportunity to fly out to New Jersey to visit them and my uncle for a long weekend.

It was a much need, really good trip. It had been over two years since the last time I saw them. During my last visit, my grandpa was sick in the hospital most of the time. This time he was much healthier and happier. My sweet grandma cried when she saw me. The coolest thing was seeing my grandpa walk. Five years ago or so, he had to get one of his legs amputated due to diabetes complications. I never thought I'd see him walk ago and felt for his loss of independence and dependency on the wheelchair and my uncle. Especially after seeing him sick and week two years ago, the thought of him walking just didn't even enter my mind as a possibility. But my grandpa is stubborn and preservers. He can't walk far, but he has his prosthetic leg he can strap on and use a walker to get down the hall and back. It was inspiring to see what he could do. It's taken a long time for him to get this far. But he's done it.

The really fun part of the trip was going to Carlo's Bake Shop. It's the bakery that is the scene of the reality TV show, The Cake Boss. My grandparents and uncle probably thought I was crazy for wanting pastries from the bakery that had a line out the door and down the block. But we had driven 45 minutes to get there, so I didn't want to make the trip a waste. So I waited in line. The wait was totally worthwhile! I bought a bunch of cannollis, a lobster tail and some cookies to bring home to Dave. I love spoiling my grandparents with cannollis, because they ALWAYS spoiled me and my sister with cannollis every time we saw them. They would even bring them to Minnesota on the airplane. These days, since they're both diabetic, they don't get sweet treats too often, so I love going to the bakery and bringing them our special treat. The only sad thing was that my Grandma didn't remember eating hers. Her memory is going and thought we were teasing her when talking about the cannollis she ate. But I know she enjoyed it while she was eating it.

I took a couple of pictures at Carlo's Bake Shop. I really didn't think I'd see any people on the show at the bakery. I figured that they probably only work these days when the show is filming. I have no idea if that is true or not, but they were actually filming the day I went to the bakery. So all the main people on the show were there. Mauro, Stretch, Mary and Buddy! (Note: I had to look at the Web site to figure out who was who. Haha). Anyway, here are my pics! Enjoy!

Here's the front of the bakery. 

They filmed me in line....so who knows, I may be in a future episode of The Cake Boss. Look for the girl who is taking a picture of the cameraman with her cell phone.

Here's Buddy!!! He even paused on the stairs so I could take the picture. Hardly anyone else even noticed!

Here's the lobster tail. It's a flaky pastry filled with a creamy filling. I saw it on the show and wanted to try it! It was so yummy.

J.B.